


What the Hell Would I Be Without You?

by peppermintyero



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/M, Gen, also bisexual winn but it's not a big plot point or anything, but not until the end so don't worry, mentions of suicidal thoughts and self-harm, mostly just an unconventional friendship, winn has a thing for assistants
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-29
Updated: 2016-03-29
Packaged: 2018-05-23 22:38:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6132554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peppermintyero/pseuds/peppermintyero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Winn likes to assume the best in people. People like his father. People like Siobhan Smythe. But he’s dug himself into a hole too deep to dig out of.  What could he say, maybe CatCo assistants were his type.<br/>OR<br/>how Winslow Schott Jr. fell in love, fell out of love, made a new friend and had an allergic reaction all in the same week.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Saturday/Sunday- Roses

**Author's Note:**

> so i'm obsessed with supergirl right now. the show is my crack and honestly i'm so emotionally invested it isn't funny. i wrote this a while ago, when we got out first glimpses at siobhan smythe on the show and i just thought of how amazingly awful winn/siobhan would be so my brain child came to life. of course this isn't completely canon as i wrote it before siobhan had any interaction with winn but i like to think they'll do something with them in the future. 
> 
> /also/, before i forget, in later chapters they'll be talk of suicidal thoughts and other things along those lines- but i'll mention it here when it comes up. 
> 
> i hope you enjoy,  
> -facie rose

Fiddling with his monitor, Winn let out a loud exhale. It had been a boring day, Kara had been caught with something at the DEO and that new assistant. Winn had the unfortunate case of meeting Siobhan before Kara had. She introduced herself and once he had the done the same she gave him a strange look and said “Winn Schott? Like the serial killer?”  
  
Not a great first impression.  
  
He had proceeded to blush like crazy and let out a small “Nice to meet you too” and before running to the hideout. Winn had tried to ignore her for the rest of the day, which was probably for the best from the way he saw she was treating Kara- she didn’t seem like a particularly nice person. She came off to him as a mixture of Cat Grant and Alex Danvers’ bad side.  
  
A combination he wasn’t interested in confronting.  
  
Winn had learnt from past experience to always assume the best in people. He wasn’t trusting by any means, but he always gave people a second chance. Even his father. Even people like Siobhan.  
  
So what if she came off as a controlling, manic, bitchy she-demon. She might just be nervous. People could get mean when they got nervous, right? At least he had tomorrow to look forward to. The big 26. Winn’s birthday was a particularly uneventful day, it had been like that since he was in middle school.  
  
His mom used to buy him a cheap cake and give him 50 dollars and he could stay up to 10:30 if it was a school night. That was it really. And once he moved out and headed to college he only really had the money his mother would mail him and now he didn’t have that either. His mom cut off all ties with him a few years ago- when she decided to ‘discover herself’ and started dating other women, got three cats and got a gym membership. It was a weird time.  
  
Still Winn was content with it. He just planned on watching some Doctor Who and eating a hideous amount of vegan ice cream and pizza pockets.  
  
His thoughts were paused when he heard someone clear their throat in attempt to get his attention. He thought it was Kara at first and his heart leapt into mouth when he swivelled around and saw Siobhan there, a less-than-impressive bouquet of roses in her hand.  
  
She thrusted them towards him. “Happy Birthday,” she said, a large, false smile on her face.  
  
“I-I’m sorry, I don’t understand,” Winn stammered.  
Rolling her eyes, Siobhan dropped the flowers by her side. “It’s your birthday tomorrow, is it not?”  
  
With a raised eyebrow, Winn nodded. “Yeah, but I don’t…That’s tomorrow and I don’t even work Sundays.” He didn’t understand, Siobhan hated him, right? At least that was what he assumed. He was friends with Kara -best friends even- and she defiantly did not like Kara.  
  
So that must have put him in the same box.  
  
“Exactly. You’re not here tomorrow, so you get these cheap gas station flowers, curtesy of Ms. Grant, early,” she said half-shrugging her shoulder. Winn let his mouth fall into an ‘o’ shape. “Don’t make yourself seem more special than you are. The date came up in Ms Grant’s emails and I was right next to the display.” Her words were stern and she glanced down at the bouquet. They stems weren’t cut evenly and the paper they were wrapped in was damp at the bottom.  
  
But they were white roses, Winn’s favourite. He’d given a bunch of them to Kara for her birthday last year, but she’d scrunched up her nose at them. Kara was too kind to tell him right to his face she didn’t’ like the smell of roses, so she thanked him but Winn knew she threw them out the second she had the chance.  
  
Winn gave her a small smile, taking the flowers from her. “Well thanks. I’ll put them in some water when I get home. Ms Grant doesn’t like people having flowers that aren’t from some exotic jungle in India.”  
  
Siobhan twisted her mouth into a small smirk, shaking her head. “For a good reason, I’ll have to wash my hands to the bone now I have that revolting stem-water and pesticide on me.” It wasn’t meant to be a joke, she kept her face as straight as she could but Winn still let out a breathy laugh. “I thought you’d like that, treat it like it was some foreign perfume. You’re like a young Cat Grant,” he said, twisting the flowers around in his hands clumsily. Siobhan nodded slightly and turned away, striding away from his desk.  
  
Winn took a deep breath, tossing the flowers next to his computer, knocking over a few of his collectables. He caught Kara’s gaze from his seat, she gave him a raised eyebrow and a mouthed ‘what was that?’ He shrugged and turned back to his screen.  
  
As he went back to his document, Winn diverted his eyes to the roses. They were a bit of an eye-sore up close. A few of the petals were torn and crumpled but they still smelled nice and he couldn’t see the imperfections from a distance.  
  
He’d have to find a vase somewhere, even though they’d probably only last until the day after tomorrow. They’d still be around for his birthday. Winn picked off a petal and fiddled with it for a moment, smiling to himself. He froze. “Oh my God,” he whispered to himself. He dropped the crushed petal and swallowed hard. Looking over his shoulder, Winn caught a glimpse of Siobhan working away.  
  
Winn turned back and pressed him forehead into his palm. “Oh. My. God. Not again.”  
  
It seemed Winn Schott Jr had a thing for the assistants Cat Grant chose. Even the arrogant ones.

* * *

  
  
Winn hummed to himself as he shuffled around his lounge room. He had his DVD paused and was on an ice-cream break, choosing weather he should go for Vanilla or Mint for the emotional high of 10’s regeneration. It had been a quiet night and Winn had been able to forget about the inevitable fact he refused to name during the third episode of season 3.  
  
That was until he caught sight of the flowers again as he passed the kitchen.  
  
He had found a slightly chipped vase in the back of his closet and now the roses sat half wilted on his dining table.  
  
It was nothing. She had just read the date and decided to pick some cheap flowers up while she was there. Why would that mean anything? Maybe she was just a nice person. Reaching out, Winn pressed on of the rose buds between his fingers, breaking it off the steam. He pushed out some air from between his lips before throwing it onto the table.  
  
Hopeless pining over a women who probably hated him. Great. Why was he such a disaster? At least he had a sliver of a chance with Kara before he was rejected, Siobhan wasn’t even a close friend. She more of an enemy.  
  
An enemy with really nice cheekbones and hair.  
  
Even since he started working with ‘Supergirl’, he had seem a lot of evil people. Hell, even the man who shared his name was evil. Siobhan Smythe didn’t really seem like any of them. She just seemed like one of the girls in high school who used to write insults on his locker in permanent marker during gym class.  
  
  
Mean, but mostly just annoying.  
  
As he sat back down on his sofa with his ice cream (he’d settled on mint), Winn stared at his paused TV screen for a moment. He’d deal with this another time. This was his birthday night, all he had to do was get through this day and he could freak out about whoever he wanted tomorrow.  
  
Which he would definitely do.


	2. Monday-Mission Control

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when i first wrote this, siobhan smythe and winn's interaction was non-existent, so imagine how i felt when it turned out that not only did winn love doctor who like i predicted but winn and siobhan ended hooking up! it was insane!
> 
> aannndd, i want to thank everyone for how well this was received. i didn't expect my first real fanfic after so long to go so well! hope you guys enjoy, this is mostly a view on kara and winn's current situation with a little slip of the tongue from siobhan ;)

The rest of Winn’s night had gone just as planned. He’d gotten up to half way through the Matt Smith era before falling asleep on his couch.

Of course, that had left him no time to set his alarm for the next morning and the start of his Monday had been more than stressful. Still, he’d been able to catch his bus in time which was an upside.

On his way out the door, he’d also thrown out the roses. The white petals had gone brown overnight. While he threw them into the trash can outside of his apartment building, Winn couldn’t help but feel a slight irony towards it. He never imagined he’d get rid of the first bouquet of flowers a girl bought him the day after.

Now he was sitting in the hideout, waiting for Kara to return. It had been a fairly small mission compared to what they had been dealing with for the last few weeks- just a house-fire. With complete honesty, Winn much preferred this. There was no danger of him losing Kara.

He shivered at the memory of the Black Mercy.

She could’ve died with him by her side. Winn shut his eyes for a beat, sucking in a breath. She was fine now, that was over. Besides criminal insanity, over-thinking was also a Schott family trait.

One, like the criminal insanity, Winn would rather do without.

The door suddenly opened, causing Winn to jump. It was Kara. She entered, dressed in her work clothes.

“Hey, you did good out there Supergirl,” he said, turning around to face her. “But make sure you brush off your shoes next time, you’re going to get ash all over the carpet.”

Rolling her eyes, Kara threw herself onto the sofa. “Oh yeah, I just saved two families and you’re so worried about me messing up your carpet. It’s not even yours, you didn’t install it,” she retorted.

Winn chuckled and turned back to his screen. This was nice, just the two of them laughing together, with no looming threat. Then there was a loud beep emitted from his computer.

“Looks like evil stops for no lunch break. Hit and run on 4th Avenue,” Winn said looking over to an annoyed Kara.

“That’s perfect. Tell Ms Grant I got a blood nose or something and I was cleaning up.”

Winn nodded, smiling slightly.

And with that, Supergirl was gone.

Now back at his office desk, Winn was able to relax. Kind of.

Kara had been gone for a while and even though he’d agreed on the story she made up, he’d freaked out under Cat’s glare and didn’t say anything at all. He just shrunk into himself because Cat rolled her eyes and told him to go back to work and stop wasting her time.

He’d then heard Siobhan proceeded to muffle a laugh into her hand from her seat.

So Winn sat, waiting for Kara to return. He was about to head over to James’ office when the elevator dinged, revealing an ever so slightly dishevelled Kryptonian. Rising quickly, Winn rushed over to her as Kara moved over to her desk.

“Kara, what took you so long? I was wor-“

“Not now Winn, okay? I have to get to the DEO, it’s an emergency. Alex needs me,” she said, cutting him off. “Cover for me again, please?” she pleaded, picking up a few papers.

Winn paused, looking around. “Well, about that. I kind of-“

“You know what, it’ll be fine. I’ll talk to James, he has a meeting with Ms Grant anyway.” Kara turned to him and the corners of her mouth twitched into a smile. “I’ll call you tonight.”

Winn blinked, confused by how fast everything was going. “Yeah, see you later,” he replied as she sped back towards the opening elevator doors.

He let out a sigh. It was always like this. They’d have a nice moment together and then she'd have to go, and half the time she never told him why. He wouldn’t voice it, but it hurt a little.

“Okay, White Trash Smurf, you’re going to need to move, I have somewhere to be,” a voice quipped from behind. Siobhan.

“Sorry, yeah,” he muttered, leaning against Kara’s desk so the brunette could pass through. She scanned him as she walked. “Next time, try to keep your obsession with Danvers out of the work place. It’s like two awkward, badly dressed cats in heat.”

Winn felt his face go red. “W-What? I’m not obsessed with her, and she’s definitely not obsessed with me. We’re just friends”

Siobhan let out a laugh. “So that’s what we’re calling it now."

Embarrassment rising in his chest, Winn fell in step with Siobhan. “I don’t think you understand, me and Kara aren’t together.” He left out the part about his rejection.

With a raised eyebrow, the women glanced at Winn from the corner of her eye. “Wait, you’re serious? I just assumed that nerdy assistant-plus-boring IT geek equalled romance.” She smirked at her own joke while Winn just scrunched up his nose in discomfort.

“Well, it doesn’t, okay? Don’t just assume things.”

Raising her hands in mock surrender, Siobhan let her smirk fall for a moment. “Fine, I believe you. You could do better than her anyway, she seems like a prude.” Her face twisted into one of regret at what she had said. “Not that you seem any better, you probably masturbate in the dark.” She then turned on her heels and left Winn standing there.

His heart pressed against his chest as he tried to understand the fact Siobhan Smythe told him he could do better. Back-handed comment aside.

* * *

 

True to her word, Kara called at exactly 9: 15, just as Winn got out of the shower. The two talked like she hadn’t spent her whole day fighting an alien escapee. Winn sparked up conversation about Star Wars and they talked for nearly an hour until the phone was hot in Winn’s hand.

“Okay, well it’s getting late, I should go shower,” Kara said after a short pause between them.

Winn smiled to himself. “You probably should, or you’re going to show up at work tomorrow covered in alien juices. Well, I guess all your juices are alien juices” Kara let out a loud, abrupt laugh.

“Winn! That’s gross.” Her laughter slowly died out and he heard her shift around on her couch. “Oh, question before I go, what day is it tomorrow? I have a meeting with Ms Grant’s publicity team on the 11th and I have some papers to get ready.”

“The 5th I think, but don’t quote me on that,” he replied.

 “Really? That’s awesome, I could’ve sworn it was lat-…W-Wait, the _5 th_? Oh my God, Winn, your birthday. Crud, I am _so_ sorry,” she stuttered.

Winn cringed, he felt bad for not reminding her but he probably would’ve felt equally as awful if he did. “No, it’s fine. You know I never do anything for my birthday anyway.”

It was true. The only reason Siobhan got him something was because she didn’t know. There was no sentiment there.

He had to keep reminding himself that for some reason.

_‘You could do better than her anyway’_

Kara sighed.  “At least let me buy you dinner at Noonans. If I do that I won’t feel like the bad guy.”

“Well I’m not going to turn down free food,” he joked, trying to lighten the mood.

“Hey, just call me Siobhan Smythe,” she said, grin evident in her voice before she hung up.

If she only knew.

 

 


	3. Tuesday- Formal Invitation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay let's get right into it! this chapters a little longer than my others, just because we're getting into the juicy stuff now. winn is a lovesick puppy over two girls, which isn't a good thing at all. 
> 
> \- facie rose

It was hard to keep his feelings for Siobhan hidden.

Could he call them feelings? It was just a school boy crush, a strange infatuation with a girl he knew he couldn’t get. Sure, she was pretty damn amazing, but she was also the polar opposite of himself.

He was introverted and quiet, she was bold and a little cocky. It would never work.

She didn’t even like him. She probably made fun of him with all of her prep school graduate friends behind his back.

Stupid love-struck Winn from IT with the Amiibos on his desk and cosplay-repair supplies in his top drawer.

He was practically a one-man freak show for people like her.

Stood by the coffee machine with his Star Trek mug in one hand a stack of papers in the other, Winn waited for James to walk past. Kara had already run off to tend Cat and he wasn’t exactly friendly with anyone else on the floor.

When the taller man did arrive, Winn had already noticed Siobhan walking behind and-oh _great-_ she was totally checking James out.

Winn bit the inside of his cheek, giving his friend a small wave but his eyes still drifted over to Siobhan’s. She kept _her_ eyes glued on James’ ass. What was it about James that Cat Grant’s assistants found so irresistible?

What was he thinking, it was very clear what they saw in him. They saw some dashing knight in shining armour. Some Disney prince.

Siobhan could do better than him, better than anyone in the office. She was smart and beautiful and-even though she wasn’t attempting to be-she was funny. She was practically a Disney princess. No, he took that back, Disney princesses were dainty and sweet and almost always needed rescuing, Siobhan was much better.

Winn was a goofy side-kick.

“Winn!” James said abruptly, waving a hand in his field of vision. “Are you with me? I called your name twice but it kind of looked like you were off on Krypton or something,” he joked.

Winn laughed uncomfortably, placing his mug down on the bench he was leaning on. “Yeah, sorry, I was just a little distracted. Lots of paperwork, you know?” The lie wasn’t very convincing, Winn nearly never had paperwork, but hopefully it was enough for James to change the subject.

Thankfully, he did. Nodding his head in agreement, James began preparing his own cup of coffee. “Definitely, it can be a real pain in the ass.”

The two fell into casual conversation, small talk and the like until James announced he had a meeting to head to. “It’s about the Daily Planet anniversary party, I’m on photography and Kara’s there to buy Cat Grant’s drinks. Because why would we ever actually want to go to a party. We only ever work,” he said, sarcasm dripping from his words.

Winn rose an eyebrow. “I didn’t even know it was a thing. Guess I missed the memo.” It wasn’t true, he just hadn’t been invited. Why would Cat need an IT at an important party?  Plus Winn wasn’t the best in social environments.  Meaning he was a horrible embarrassment to himself and everyone around him.

“Oh. Well, uh, I’m sure you’ll find out more about it later.”

“Yeah. Of course.”

* * *

 

Needless to say, Winn did not find out anything else about the party besides from the fact James and Kara were going together and it was on Sunday night.

That was it really, and that all he wanted to know. He was just going to go on with his normal Sunday and then smile like usual when Kara and James told him about it on Monday. It was a simple enough plan.

His plan was put on hold when he ran into Siobhan on his way out of the building. They both moved out of the doors at the same time, their shoulders brushing against each other. The contact seemingly startled Siobhan, as she audibly gasped before her face fell into one of slight annoyance at seeing it was Winn.

“Sorry, uh, ladies first,” Winn said with an awkward smile. Siobhan just gave him a dirty look as she took a step back. “No, please, go ahead. I don’t want you following me home,” she replied, holding out an arm in faux kindness.

Winn just hummed, not knowing how to respond. “Uh, s-so you’re going to the Daily Planet party thing aren’t you? I heard a bunch of people got invited.”

Confused Winn was still speaking and not running out the door, Siobhan shifted a little uncomfortably. “Of course, I did. I happen to know you didn’t.” Winn watched as she drew her eyes around the room, avoiding his gaze.

“Yeah, but it’s no big deal. I was just going to catch up on some video games, maybe work on my Ash cosplay, my normal Sundays.” Winn took a deep breath, scratching the back of his head. “And I can’t believe I just told you that…,” he breathed.

Siobhan’s face contorted as if she was contemplating something. “I have a plus one.” It sounded like she was just stating it, but the situation showed otherwise.

“You do? That’s-That’s good.” It was clear what Siobhan was indicating, but Winn wasn’t too sure if he should be the one to ask. He didn’t want to seem desperate, even though that was the case.

Siobhan shifted her weight from leg-to-leg. “Yes, apparently Ms Grant thought I was with someone. I was going to tell her but I didn’t see a point, I’m not turning down a party.”

Winn nodded half-heartily, clearing his throat as he did. He was about to turn and leave, labelling it a lost cause, when Siobhan let out a sigh.

“Well I don’t really have anyone to take and I don’t want to look like a loner, if you’re not doing anything Sunday, I guess you could be my plus one. But you’re paying for my drinks and it’s _not_ a date, okay, Toy Boy? It’s a charity, I feel sorry for you,” she said sternly. Winn beamed internally. Apart from the snide nickname, that was one of the nicest things he’d heard her say, which probably wasn’t a good thing but it gave him hope.

“Of course. It’ll just be two friends hanging out, not even friends, just acquaintances. Hell, just two people who know each other,” Winn said, trying to play it cool, failing horribly.

Siobhan rolled her eyes and crossed her arms across her chest. “Please, stop talking before I change my mind, just don’t arrive at the same time as me, I don’t want people getting the wrong idea.”

 

* * *

 

Dinner with Kara went just as it always did. He got a salad so he didn’t look like a slob and went starving for the rest of the night and Kara raided the seafood buffet.

They talked for a while and every now and then Kara would apologise for forgetting his birthday in which Winn would just wave his hand in dismissal.

“You know, I always have the hardest time choosing a dessert,” Kara mumbled to herself. Winn chuckled at the sudden change in conversation.

“You say that, but we both know you’re going to get sticky buns.” Smirking, Kara noddded in agreement.

“Oh my God, I nearly forget to tell you! Ms Grant called me and Siobhan into her office this morning and called her, to her face, The Forgotten Kardashian. You should’ve been there,” Kara said, her voice filled with laughter.

Winn’s smile faltered for a beat and he fiddled with his fork. “Totally, I wish I saw that,” he said, hoping that would be the end of all Siobhan-centred conversation.

It wasn’t.

“That wasn’t even the start. Then she said that there was probably a failed TV reality pilot based on the Smythe family!” Kara then fell into a long rant, a rant that left Winn sitting there awkwardly, wishing he could sink into the floorboards or just scream out that he liked Siobhan. He didn’t though, he just kept quiet, grunting in reaction every now and then.

As she went on, Winn felt his body stiffen. He was going to stop holding things in, he’d promised Kara that.

“And I know it sounds mean, but I have the feeling she’s got a thing going on with the guy at reception- the one with the double-jointed elbows- either that or she’s just a little, you know, freewheeling. Not that there’s anything wrong with that kind of-“

“Siobhan gave me her plus-one.”

Blinking, the blonde put down her fork.

“What?”

Winn felt his palms become sweaty. He shouldn’t have said anything, now he was going to make himself seem like an idiot.

“For that party thing, Siobhan had a plus one and she let me have it. It’s not a date or anything, just the two of us going. Together. Like friends, but not really.” Winn could tell that everything he was saying was making things worse as Kara’s expression turned from one of confusion to one of slight anger and then finally into one of disappointment.

“Kara? Are you…angry at me? Because I can’t tell,” he asked cautiously. Kara just shook her head, but her face didn’t change.

“No, I’m fine. I just, I’m just gonna head home. I had some DEO stuff to do for Hank, so, yeah.” She then took a fifty out of her purse and threw in onto the table. “I’ll see tomorrow.” Then she left, leaving Winn alone with two half eaten mains in front of him and a lifetime of embarrassment.

“Good job,” he said to himself. “You just ruined your week.”


	4. Wednesday- Beatles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so it's officially been 1000 days since my last update, whoops. school been gross and supergirl was been tearing me apart with siobhan/winn cuteness so this kind of fell on the backburner but i've retunred to a hopefully more acurate schedule. alas, this chapter is pretty short but i have the next one ready to go so hopefully that makes up for it.
> 
> plus 1x18 was practically the winn/siobhan wonder-episode for me. so much angst it was hardly fair! now back to regular programming.
> 
> -facie rose

It may have sounded crazy but Winn would’ve given anything to go back to when he was spending his days pining over Kara. It was painful, but at least he still had her on his side.

Now Kara was ignoring him and Siobhan only ever talked to him when she was criticising him. It wasn’t a dream situation.

Now when he said ignoring he really meant that she was treating him like any other person in the office. Kara was too nice to cut Winn out of her life completely but she spoke to him as if they were just acquaintances and not best friends. Maybe that was accurate, Winn wasn’t even sure if they were best friends right now.

He might as well haven’t not showed up today.

God, why did he keep doing this to himself? Why couldn’t he just have one normal relationship with a woman instead of ruining them all horribly?

No wonder he only dated one girl in college. No wonder it only lasted three weeks.

He’d had a nice moment with Siobhan in the elevator on his way to work though, which had to have meant something.

Winn with his black coffee-no sugars and his laptop bag and Siobhan with her exotic tea and her expensive headphones.  He’d stood there and just listened to the murmurings of her music. The Beatles. He’d never had a really strong connection with music, his life was mostly spent in code and rewiring radios, not listening to them, but he could appreciate a good song when it came along.

He couldn't help but wonder what other things she listened to.

The moment had been cut short, of course, but Kara and another women Winn didn’t know entering. The elevator, now crowed, had become a lot less welcoming than it had been a second a ago. An IT guy is in a confined space with his two work-place crushes. He could almost hear the punchline and the drum beat as the time went buy. 

* * *

 

His day had been uneventful without Kara and the craziness that came with her and Supergirl. He couldn’t actually remember a day in the past few months when he’d down a day of solid work without some kind of interruption. Head resting in his hand Winn took a second to take in all of the work he had been putting off.

It was, in the simplest terms, a lot. Sometimes he wondered why Cat kept him around. It definitely wasn’t his work ethic.

After a good few hours of copying stranger’s paperwork, Winn has finally freed to his lunch break. He’d needed a moment to catch his breath when Siobhan headed into the elevator after him. Twice in one day, it was a god-damned miracle.

He took a small step back, to let the women walk ahead and she did wordlessly. It was clear Siobhan had tried to put as much distance between the two of them as she could, her elbows an inch away from the wall.

Hands deep in his pockets, Winn swallowed deeply. How was he meant to go to that ridiculous party with Siobhan if he couldn’t even be in the same room as her?  The silence between them becoming borderline awkward Winn scanned his brain for conversation topics.

“I like some of their earlier stuff a lot better, but they’re really good,” he said, not even realising the words were rushing out of his mouth.

He regretted it the moment he said it. Winn stood in the thick, uncomfortable silence waiting for Siobhan to say something.

“What?” she said after a pause, looking slightly taken-aback.

Winn felt his face go red. “Th-The Beatles. What you were listening to this morning…I like them too,” he replied sheepishly. He expected Siobhan to roll her eyes in her usual fashion and ignore him, but she simply nodded as if he’d said the most obvious thing in the world. “I’d be worried if you didn’t.” Then she turned her head back to the doors and ran her hands along the sides of her pencil skirt.

Winn internally sighed with relief. That could’ve gone a lot worse.

“Saying that, I’m a little surprised you felt the need to tell me that like I was your own Manic Pixie Dream Girl. I might just give you my earphones and everything,” she deadpanned. Winn didn’t know if he should’ve laughed, Siobhan’s humour wasn’t one he was very familiar with.

Siobhan turned her head with a cocked eyebrow. “It was a joke.” Winn chuckled quietly, but Siobhan’s expression told him he’d been a little late to the punch.

“So,” Winn said with faux confidence, “What are you going to wear to the party? Colour wise I mean.”

The brunette didn’t turn to face Winn but she still kept up the conversation. “Purple. But don’t go around wearing some lilac bowtie to match, have some self-respect.” Pulling his shoulders into himself, Winn nodded slowly.

“I won’t.” He was almost embarrassed at how scared it came out. He sounded like a teenage boy who’d just been asked to the prom by a cheerleader. That was pretty much their exact relationship.  

Except Siobhan would never ask out a teenage Winn. No one would. His pity party aside, the doors slid open and the two both began for the exit but Winn stopped to let the brunette in front. She left without saying anything which was probably for the best as Winn’s face was already as red as he could stand.

Tomorrow, he thought as he trailed towards the break room, was going to be better. He’d make things better with Kara and buy a tie that was definitely anything but purple. Maybe grey, so he wouldn't stand out. That was probably the best choice for him. It didn't even matter, he still had four days to freak about the situation.

Right now, he just wanted some lunch.


End file.
